I was a childhood sexist

This post over at Shakespeare's Sister has got me on the nostalgia and navel gazing train.

As I wrote in the comments, I was a big ole butch tomboy when I was a child. I'm sure many of my elementary school classmates would be surprised that I'm not a butch lesbian right now. (My high school classmates would likely say "Who? Maureen...? Nope, not ringing a bell.")

My sister likes to say I was a born feminist, but that's not entirely true. I was very aware at a very early age that girls were not treated fairly, and I was *pissed off* about it. I tried to fight it, but eventually I decided it would just be better to be a boy, because girls sucked!

I had to be forced, kicking and screaming, into dresses for family photos. I learned how to handle a hurley, played baseball, and roughhoused with other boys. I have a vivid memory of hiding in a grove of trees with R & K (boys), looking at the dirty pictures in National Lampoon magazine, and finding the nude women wonderfully titillating. That's what I liked about girls when I was little - I liked what they looked like. Otherwise, I despised their weakness, their shrieking when they encountered a bug or a worm.

Now that I'm an adult, I'm still not like a lot of other women that I meet. I'm not a tomboy, or even a little bit butch. I prefer skirts to pants, I wear make-up. But now, as a mostly heterosexual married woman, I truly love women. I love my sisters, I love my girlfriends. I love the sisterhood of my online acquaintances (can I call them friends? I think of them as such, but I don't want to presume anything.) I know so many young women who proudly say that most of their friends are guys, but I can't say that. Most of my friends are women. And I am happy about that.

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