Bushspeak to English translator?

I think it might be a field to consider - I suspect it will be a growth industry in the next few years.

Of course, I am talking about the brilliant oratorical stylings of one George Duh? Bush:

via the brilliant Digby

Because the -- all which is on the table begins to address the big cost drivers. For example, how benefits are calculate, for example, is on the table; whether or not benefits rise based upon wage increases or price increases. There's a series of parts of the formula that are being considered. And when you couple that, those different cost drivers, affecting those -- changing those with personal accounts, the idea is to get what has been promised more likely to be -- or closer delivered to what has been promised.

'Does that make any sense to you? It's kind of muddled. Look, there's a series of things that cause the -- like, for example, benefits are calculated based upon the increase of wages, as opposed to the increase of prices. Some have suggested that we calculate -- the benefits will rise based upon inflation, as opposed to wage increases. There is a reform that would help solve the red if that were put into effect. In other words, how fast benefits grow, how fast the promised benefits grow, if those -- if that growth is affected, it will help on the red.

'Okay, better? I'll keep working on it.'

I tried to do a little parsing myself, to figure out what the hell any of that meant.

On the table: big cost drivers:

how benefits are calculate (sic)

Whether or not benefits rise based on wage increases

Whether or not benefits rise based on price increases

Okay, - what Bush is saying here is that his people are looking at the big costs of Social Security, which they believe to be how benefits are calculate (again, sic), and whether benefits should increase based on wage increases or get cut based on wage increases, and whether benefits should increase based on price increases or decrease based on price increases.

Series of parts of the formula being considered,

With personal accounts those (??which??) change

Idea is to get closer to what has been promised

I admit - I'm stumped as to what he means here. I don't know what changes with personal accounts, and right now, Social Security delivers exactly what it promises, so what's the prob?

There is a reform that will help solve red

Finally, I can agree with Duh?. There is something that needs to be reformed, and it definitely involves the color red.

I must ask, in all seriousness: is this man on drugs?