3/08/2006

A Modest Proposal

I've been thinking over the anti-choice movement, and to find a way for Democrats and Progressives to bring some of the anti-choice people over from the dark side. I proposed this over at Shakespeare's Sister, in the comments section, but I've been thinking about it and I think it deserves a greater airing.

Why don't we just remove the testicles of all men, when they hit puberty, to be returned when they are legally wed and therefore legally obligated to care for any sprog they help create.

*Diminished sex drive due to absense of testicles means the problem of premarital sex will go away!
*By the same token, the occurence of rape will diminish, which means no pesky exceptions for pure virgins who find themselves knocked up due to an unwilling sexual encounter. It insures moral coherence!
*If an unmarried woman gets pregnant, we'll know that she's an adulterer, so there is still the option to punish, or at least shame, women for having teh sex.
*Less invasive then ownership of uteri and ovaries, since they're just hanging there on the outside rather than tucked away on the inside.

True, some men will probably be opposed to this. There are a lot of good progressive men out there who probably don't deserve this kind of treatment. But women aren't the only Americans who can't be trusted to manage their own reproductive health. There are men out there who have fathered multiple children, only to abandon them to life with a single mother, which, as we know, is second only to a household parented by two loving people of the same gender in sending this country straight to hell.

I'm glad I could solve this dilemma in a way that is fair to both genders. I will be contacting my legislators shortly to ask them to put forward my modest proposal.

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